Jim Dowd. Not so relished in South Yorkshire.

Pity poor Jim Dowd. A Londoner to his boots and scourge of cheap knock-offs of quality brands. He led the way in the debate on intellectual property in the chamber yesterday, castigating “parasitic” copies of established products.

Tears were welling-up among fellow MPs and onlookers as he laid out the foul calumny that he himself had suffered, just the previous weekend,

“I was in the Hare and Billet pub in Blackheath (in London). And I was having lunch, and I asked if they had any Worcestershire Sauce – everybody knows the famous manufacturers of Worcestershire Sauce.

Now, I’m a simple soul from south-east London, and I thought there was only one Worcestershire Sauce. And the very nice chap who was serving us went away and said ‘certainly’, and he came back with a bottle, and it was shaped like the bottle which I always remembered containing, I think it’s Lea and Perrins, Worcestershire Sauce and their marvellous concoction: same shape, same size, the label was amazingly enough orange with black lettering.

But it was something from Sheffield, from somewhere called Henderson’s – whoever they were.

Now, I’m sure Mr Henderson and his company is a perfectly estimable organisation and I’m sure they pursue an entirely legitimate business, but I couldn’t help feeling at the time that this, of all the colours they could choose for their label, of all the shapes they could have for their bottle, I didn’t even know there was such a thing as Sheffield sauce until then, but I thought this is an ideal example of just how easy these things are to do (to copy).”

Damn straight Jim. Who the hell is Mr.Henderson anyway?

What’s that? Henderson’s is a brand that has been established for over 100 years? Really? A great British export, shipped all round the world, you say? 750,000 bottles sold each year?

Paul Blomfield, MP for Sheffield Central, rode to the rescue earlier today to set Jim straight, writing him an open letter on Facebook.

But it was already too late.

A bandwagon had started rolling with Nick Clegg, lest we forget MP for Sheffield Hallam, lashing the horses, desperately trying to get out of Rennard Central.

The deputy prime minister has penned his own a missive to Jim Dowd, though unlike Paul Blomfield’s effort, it is a typically po-faced work, showcasing Cleggy’s ability to pick the wrong tone for almost any occasion.

A particular highlight in Clegg’s letter was this line,

“I hope you can appreciate that Sheffielders are fiercely proud of it. We are confident it would win in any blind taste test…”

“We”? Really Cleggy? Because of course, Nick Clegg is renowned for his south Yorkshire vowels and Sheffield roots.

His love of Sheffield is of course why he has that rather lovely £1.5m townhouse in Putney, just by the banks of the Thames, as his main family home.

Expect countless Lib Dem councillors to follow their leader’s example and deluge Jim Dowd’s office with faux outrage from the Sheffield yellow peril.

Pity poor Jim Dowd indeed.

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One Response to “Jim Dowd. Not so relished in South Yorkshire.”

  1. Ex-Labour says:

    I dont pity Jim Dowd, as he clearly knows nothing of which he speaks. I’m guessing he is the usual thick Labour MP. I’ve never had Hendersons relish but I do know of its long existance and manufacture in Sheffield. Tell Jim a quick glance at this new-fangled “t’interweb thingy” would have told him all he needs to know.

    As for the blog its just a cheap shot at Clegg which I welcome and encourage all to do !

    No doubt Labour will adopt a position on this latest Twatter Storm, and expect Red Ed to demand a price freeze so the “poor” can buy a bottle or eventhe break up of Henderson’s as of course its far too successful.

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