Inside « Labour Uncut

David Miliband emails supporters from Primrose Hill-les-Deux-Eglises.

02/10/2010, 04:31:04 PM

Should he stay or should he go now? That was the question cutting across conference. Would David Miliband ride off into the political sunset, or establish himself in residence at Primrose Hill-les-Deux-Églises?

The decision to duck the shadow cabinet bun fight had many assuming the former. But an e-mail to supporters this morning has turned heads.

In amongst the formulaic thanks and calls for unity are some interesting nuggets. He will continue to develop a new community organising model for the party. He plans to broaden his thinking in education, environmental and foreign policy. He intends to play a full and active role in the Scottish, Welsh and local elections.

For someone preparing to spend more time with their family, this is a pretty busy diary.

His continued engagement will meet with approval. The invitations to fundraising dinners and campaign days will already be piling up. And the statement that, “I can best serve Ed, the party and the country from a new position, and I look forward to working with you to make a success of the decision”, is one his brother will welcome.

Sort of.

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Gloria, la parlamentare più sexy d’Inghilterra

02/10/2010, 10:30:53 AM

la Repubblica, Italy’s second biggest selling daily, was so excited to learn that the Ashfield MP Gloria de Piero (who has Italian heritage) has been voted the sexiest female Parliamentarian that they have a special photo feature on the Bradford born ex-journalist.

With the ballot now open to elect the new shadow cabinet, an Italian is just what is needed in the PLP.

Perhaps PLP secretary, Martin O’Donovan, could ask Ms de Piero to perform Antonello Venditti’s desperate stadium lament, Ci vorrebbe un amico, at the formal announcement of the shadow cabinet election results.

Venditti wrote the song for the Italian shadow cabinet elections of 1981. Two years later, a socialist prime minister, Bettino Craxi, finally took office in Italy. But the ’81 shadow cabinet elections were a low point of skullduggery and misery.

Venditti’s sense of grief and desperation, the mix of love and hate for one’s colleagues is universal among ambitious politicians. This wooden translation gives an idea of the turmoil next week’s 30 British shadow cabinet losers can expect.

Living with you became a rough game
Ok, you won, the rest is just life.
In this story of ours, I am the one going down.
I need a friend
to be able to forget you.
I need a friend
to forget the bad.
I need a friend
in pain and in regret.
Love, illogical love, desperate love.
See, I am crying, but I have forgiven you.
And if I loved [for] nothing, love, my love, forgive
in this cold night all I need is one word.
But living with you was a tough match
it was a tough fight, regardless of how it ended
but maybe because of the magic night or just the emotion
I find myself again at your door.

At least the shadow cabinet losers will have the sexiest female member of the mother of parliaments to sing them this comfort from the home country.

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Shadow cabinet: vote for Rob ‘he’s a jolly good’ Flello

01/10/2010, 02:08:03 PM

FLELLO

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Shadow cabinet: vote for John

30/09/2010, 06:08:55 PM

jdletter

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Conference diary V: some old new generations

30/09/2010, 12:00:45 PM

As a former climate change secretary, it’s good to see Ed Miliband’s commitment to recycling. His “new generation” line from his leader’s speech was previously used by Tony Blair.

According to Alastair Campbell’s diaries from 29 May 1997, referring to suggestions about how to brand an imminent visit by Bill Clinton, Campbell writes: “I quite like ‘new generation politics’ because it suggested the generation was not so much about age but about a change in politics.”

The Who-themed line is a hardy perennial. As we said earlier in the week: bisogna cambiare tutto per non cambiare nulla.

* * * (more…)

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Conference diary IV: beef

29/09/2010, 12:21:40 PM

As the Miliband era dawns, and shadow cabinet nominations close today, a new and important figure is born in British politics.

The new leader’s victorious and vindicated campaign manager, Sadiq Khan, swept through Manchester’s echoing halls with an entourage the size of Tooting Bec. He was what the late Biggie Smalls used to call “rolling thirty deep”. (In truth, Uncut counted a mere nine flunkeys riding his slipstream, but the figure he cut was impressive).

A slightly crumpled dresser, fat chains and a pimp cane may not come easy to the man who would be shadow home secretary. But these are the ways he must master if he is to match his entourage and justify his new i/d: Sadiq Diddy.

* * *

At the start of the week, the conference rumour mill had it that Joe Irvin, former political secretary to Gordon Brown, was about to replace Charlie Whelan as Unite’s chief fixer and finagler.

Joe has been denying it to everyone who’ll listen.

“It’s rubbish. Pure speculation”, he told Uncut last night.

Most people assume that he’s just saying that, because nothing has been signed and he is a professional.

Better informed people say that he’s telling the truth. The deal is off. And, for the moment at least, Charlie stays.

The reasons are labyrinthine, and for another day.

* * *

Uncut sallies forth to the defence fringe, where tempers flare. Eric Joyce attacks Bob Ainsworth and David Miliband for “doing nothing” on defence.

Bob shoots back: “I don’t remember you coming up with any ideas when we were in government”.

Eric retorts: “Are you going to take cheap shots or are you going to come up with a Labour policy on defence”.

Gentlemen, please. You can’t fight in here. This is the war debate.

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Conference diary III: per non cambiare nulla…

28/09/2010, 11:18:12 AM

As ancient as Rome, as implacable as Sicily, is Lampedusa’s iron law of politics: “bisogna cambiare tutto per non cambiare nulla (everything must change, so that nothing changes) ”.

And so it was last night for two staffers overheard in the Midland bar:

“You’ll never guess who’s doing the Sue Nye job, this week at least”?

“No. Who”?

“Go on, guess”.

“I don’t know. Who?”

“Sue Nye”.

“Of course. Should have known.”

(Sue Nye has worked for Labour leaders since Callaghan. She was gatekeeper to Neil Kinnock and then to Gordon Brown from before the treasury till the last days in Downing Street. She is married to Gavyn Davies, the Goldman Sachs partner who also chaired the BBC).

Other at least interim team Ed Miliband staffers include Jonathan Ashworth (Brown, Harman), Rachel Kinnock (Blair, Brown, Team EM) and Anna Yearley (PLP, Brown, Team EM).

* * * (more…)

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David Prescott reports from David Miliband’s big speech

27/09/2010, 03:35:45 PM

It was like seeing a former girlfriend you’d taken for granted and finally parted from. Only to realise that you loved her after all.

Problem was, she’d moved on.

I predicted the other day that David could read the Manchester Yellow Pages and bring the house down.

But boy did he do his homework, and the media missed out on the big message.

It was the best conference speech since Blair’s inaugural address in 1994. (more…)

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Conference diary II: Sunday night and Monday morning

27/09/2010, 11:00:04 AM

As Ed Miliband prepares for the speech of his life tomorrow, Uncut understands that he has received support from a surprising quarter. Team Ed has asked for – and been granted – a copy of the speech David had prepared in the event of his own victory. Uncut assumes that, as we write, Ed’s wordsmiths are beavering away, frantically translating David’s words into fluent human.

Good luck guys. And be grateful you didn’t just beat John Prescott.

* * *

Uncut bows to none in our admiration for that legendary storm-trooper of spin, Charlie Wheelan. But we understand that Charlie’s claim to have personally switched half a dozen MPs to Ed Miliband in the final days of the campaign may be something of a smoke screen. Uncut has it on good authority that it was not Charlie, but Gordon Brown himself, who was hitting the phones for Ed in the last fortnight of polling. Having kept a dignified distance from proceedings, the interventions of Tony Bair and Peter Mandelson are believed to been the spur Gordon needed to enter the fray.

* * *

Ed Miliband leader. Ed Balls shadow chancellor. Nick Brown Chief Whip. Will reports of the death of the Brownites turn out to have been exaggerated?

* * *

While we at Unuct retain our affection for Charlie, the same cannot be said of some of his brothers in the movement. Two senior trade unions officials we spoke to yesterday were slightly miffed at the suggestion that CW single-handedly won it for their man.

“What’s Charlie doing”? asked one. “He’s out of control”.

“You know what he’s doing”, replied the other: “He’s got a book to plug”.

Too true. And Uncut expects a corker.

* * *

As Ed Miliband continues his victory tour, the intense figure of Mike Joslin can be seen ploughing the road as point man. Uncut has two words of advice for this intrepid staffer: slow down. You’ll get there. And smile. You’re doing a great job, and you’ve won. Enjoy it.

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Conference diary: the morning after, part 1

26/09/2010, 11:47:42 AM

Union chiefs toasting Ed Miliband’s success last night should be on their guard. Uncut understands that John Prescott is likely to fail in his bid to become the party’s treasurer, pipped to the post by Unite’s Diana Holland. As with the leadership, it appears that union votes were the decisive factor. Hell hath no fury like a Prescott scorned.

* * *

Changes on Team Ed? Spectators surprised at the vigour with which Neil Kinnock campaigned for our new leader will have noted Rachel Kinnock leading Ed on his tour of the victory circuit. Rachel has been a senior advisor over the past few months, and is likely to be a key player in his leadership team. More mysterious is the sudden disappearance of Polly Billington, Ed’s chief spinner. She was apparently not returning calls last night, and hungry hacks were being re-routed to other aides. Where are you Polly? Give Uncut a call.

* * *

Great excitement in the Uncut office yesterday when we received a tip from a senior Labour insider. “David’s in first”, came the message. Excitedly, we prepared to unleash our scoop to the world. Then we learned that our comrade had merely got on the train to Manchester, and seen David Miliband sitting in a first class carriage. He was in good company.

* * *

If Peter Mandelson was planning to do a turn at conference, Uncut advises him to stay away. Already identified by Team Ed as the source of much of the “bile” directed at their candidate, he has now been fingered by Team Dave as a key factor in the their defeat. Last night disappointed DM staffers were identifying Peter’s interventions at key moments as the turning point in the contest. “It was Peter that lost it for us”, said one exasperated aide.

* * *

Touring the bars in the early hours in our bid to bring our readers the most juicy conference morsels, Uncut bumped into David Clark, Robin Cook’s former special advisor. “Much more of this and you should change your name to Labour Half-cut”, he said. It’s under consideration.

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