“Much more of this and we are going to need a Devon Loch scenario to win”

News reaches Uncut that Ed Miliband’s budget response has depressed spirits on the already gloomy Labour benches in the Commons.

After weeks of narrowing polls and increasing jitters in the tea room, today’s budget set-piece was widely viewed as an opportunity for Miliband to rally his troops.

The benign economic circumstances enjoyed by George Osborne had already been priced into PLP expectations, as had the difficulties faced by the leader of the opposition in delivering an instant budget response without having had the time to study its small print.

Few expected the Labour leader to fillet the detail of what was announced, but MPs were looking for a fighting performance from their leader. Something to settle the nerves and show some command at the despatch box.

But as the MPs filtered out of the chamber following the main speeches, the mood on the Labour side was sombre. One MP who spoke to Uncut shortly after leaving the debate was scathing, describing the performance as “embarrassing,” and that morale among their colleagues was now “really quite low.” 

Looking forward to the election next year, their assessment of Labour’s prospects was bleak, “Much more of this and we are going to need a Devon Loch scenario to win.”

For readers too young to either directly recall the Devon Loch Grand National in 1956, or to have seen countless repeats of the incident on Grand National specials through the years, the clip below should help.

For this MP, and many of their colleagues, unless Ed Miliband improves, Labour will require a slip from David Cameron equivalent to that of Devon Loch’s, to triumph in 2015 . 


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19 Responses to ““Much more of this and we are going to need a Devon Loch scenario to win””

  1. Jamie says:

    Devon Loch ran in the Grand National, not the Derby!

    You’re welcome.

  2. colin wiles says:

    It was the Grand National, not the Derby.

  3. Red Rag says:

    Jesus Christ, who writes this garbage. Devon Loch was in the Grand National you doughnut. How can you expect people to read it, when you cannot even get the race the horse you are relating it was in right.

  4. Red Rag says:

    Jesus Christ, who writes this garbage. Devon Loch was in the Grand National you doughnut. How can you expect people to read it, when you cannot even get the race the horse you are relating to was in right.

  5. Editor says:

    Thanks, ignorance on the horses abounds at Uncut towers – ref corrected (Ed)

  6. swatantra says:

    Certainly a response not what Labour expected from a future PM. Just seemed like a continuation of PMQs. maybe EdM nipped out for a comfort break whilst the Chancellor was speaking and missed the whole lot, and thought PMQs was still going on.
    No mention at all of the ISA, how will lumping Shares and cash work? but £15K is welcome. We need people saving, not spending on credit. Thats what leads to financial crisises, people spending like billyeo on stuff they don’t actually need ; cupboards are stuffed will gadgets we don’t need; they should be stuffed with tinned food for that rainy day when the sun don’t shine any more. and no mention of 1p off beer when we’ve got a binge culture; fix the roof while the sun shines because we’re all in this together; mention of Eton Messes and the 1% stinking rich won’t help those going to the Food Bank. No doubt we’ll hear in the next few days what Labour would do. We could have done with a bit of that today from Ed, an Alternative Budget.

  7. uglyfatbloke says:

    Got the race wrong, but the sentiment is probably all too valid. .

  8. Red Rag says:

    Just to kill your explanation even more. Devon Loch lead the Grand National in 1956 for the vast majority of the race, then lost the race in the home run. Err…..Labour has been in front in the polls for the vast majority of this parliament, so it is the Tory Party that hopes to win “Devon Loch” style. You really need to do more research on here before posting.

  9. Danny says:

    Why not name the MP?

    Oh, I know why. They don’t exist. You made the quotes up. Another example of moronic journalism from the most amateur and one-sided platform on the internet.

    The analogy doesn’t work and you couldn’t get the facts correct. This is shockingly poor even by Uncut’s embarassingly low standards.

    The best thing about the article is that the author sensibly refrained from putting their name to it. The smart money, given its naked bias, is that Atul wrote it but the overuse of the comma in the final paragraph is distinctly Marchantesque. It’s an appalling enough article to have spawned from either.

  10. Highand says:

    There’s no difference between the partys, I think we should vote ukip to see some real change in politics, Maybe it won’t make a difference but there is a hope.

  11. robert henry says:

    sometimes i despair of labour commentators.
    pl tell me how the tories can get 6% more in the polls than labour with only 1 year left
    and ukip taking at least a third of their votes plus losing most of their northern seats

  12. Ex Labour says:

    Ah the red backlash begins to the very valid point put forward.

    Concentrate on getting the horsey facts right but miss ( or conveniently ignore ) the fact that Miliband is rubbish. His incoherent illogical response was very poor. Just sloganising and ranting will get Labour nowhere.

    Most sensible Labour supporters realised very early that Red Len dropped Labour right in the shit by dumping Ed Miliband into the leadership position.

    All coming home to roost I’m afraid.

  13. Tafia says:

    In Miliband’s defence, there wasn’t a lot he could say. He doesn’t get to see the budget until literally just an hour or so before the Chancellor makes his speech.

    This budget was remarkable by one thing in particular – none if it was leaked beforehand and as a result Miliband was flying in the dark. He had no idea what the Chancellor was going to say so no chance to work out a detailed rebuttal – so he did the obvious thing, avoided it.

  14. Fred says:

    They’re always wrong, they are Toreez.
    We’re always right, we’re lefties.
    Whenever we’re criticised its the media.
    I’m superior to you and know better due to my grasp of the English language.

    We will win, we can spell – Thanks Danny.

  15. steve says:

    Well, Balls was on the radio the yesterday and couldn’t find anything in the budget to disagree with. Labour’s problem is that, like the Tories, they are chasing after a relatively small number of southern swing voters so their polling-driven policies are as good as identical and Miliband has nothing to grouse about.

    It should be said though, at least the Tories have authenticity on their side – they are in the big game as the official party of big business. Whereas Labour, having dumped the unions, is only on the side of the careers of an increasingly befuddled group of PLP Oxbridgers.

    Certainly, for non-combatants like myself, the election campaign it going to be a lot of fun.

  16. Tafia says:

    Steve, increasingly befuddled group of PLP Oxbridgers.

    The correct description is ‘collective/hive of worthless know nothing worth even less f***wits.

    Did anyone count how many times Miliband said ‘cost of living crisis’ in his speech? I stopped at 30. And the better together crap. And the pats on the back – jesus wept, pass the sick bucket.

    Don’t his advisors tell him about slogans and catch phrases and how they get on peoples tits? It’s pathetic and it really really irritates people – especially as they remember the expenses. It wasn’t the abuse of the system that shocked people – it was what they could legitimately claim so to be told by some dork on a fortune plus expenses that there’s a cost of living crisis is frankly an insult.

  17. Danny says:

    “They’re always wrong, they are Toreez.
    We’re always right, we’re lefties.
    Whenever we’re criticised its the media.
    I’m superior to you and know better due to my grasp of the English language.

    We will win, we can spell – Thanks Danny.”

    Don’t mention it. Though if I’m being honest, it’s less my grasp of the English language and more your accomplishment in idiocy that makes me superior.

    How much have you got riding on a Conservative majority for 2015 then? If you’re that convinced that Labour and Ed Miliband are going to fail, why not lump some cash down at the bookies? There are, for good reason, some decent odds available.

    Ed is turning into somewhat of a disappointment, but not for the reasons why he is so despised around these quarters. Take a look at the current polling. Miliband displays a tentativeness is criticising the Tory budget; the poll lead slims. Last year, Miliband puts some clear water between him and the Tories by pledging state intervention in the energy market; the poll lead widens. Ed Balls commits to Tory-spending plans; the poll lead slims. Ed Miliband takes on Rupert Murdoch and shows a little backbone to the right-wing rags; the poll lead widens.

    It’s the leftist policies that are boosting Labour’s poll figures. The more right they nudge, the closer to the Tories they get, the shorter their poll lead. Yet the Progress love-in and right-wing trolls that populate this awful part of the internet cry havoc when Ed presents himself as anything other than a Blair clone. They use spurious data, biased polls, incorrect facts and made up quotes to suggest that because he isn’t like Blair, or Cameron, or Thatcher, he is doomed to fail. This article is a typical example.

    But to be honest, however much of a false hope Ed Miliband is starting to appear, his only competition for Downing Street is David Cameron and the Tory Party. That is why you should ignore my suggestion to take some of your hard-earned to your nearest William Hill and plump for a Tory majority. You’d be better off wiping your backside with it. Or give it to charity. Or better yet, give it to me. I can spend it on some more English Language lessons so I can feel even more superior.

  18. John reid says:

    Right wing trolls,Danny, a lot of people here are either labour supporters who think we’re not presenting ourselves as A govt in waiting or ex labour voters who would like to vote for us, but can’t until, we admit we got it wrong on immigration, for the wrong reasons(change the demographics get more supporters in here)’ Multi culturalism, resulting in not being able to criticise Islam, when it has homophobic elements through fear of being called racist, we were wrong not to Have the EU referndum, and Yes Iraq, and 90 days,

    I thought Fred hit the nail, on the head, I noticed you didn’t confront his points, is it because anyone who disagrees is a troll?.

  19. Danny says:

    Confront his points? Are you trying to be funny?

    He made a series of flippant, sarcastic comments in which he was attempting to imitate a stereotypical left-winger than only exists in the newspaper columns of Peter Hitchens and Richard Littlejohn. Oh, and in the comments sections of a Labour Uncut.

    And you think he hit the nail on the head with such comments?! That speaks significantly more about you than it does me I’m afraid.

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