Forged in the white heat of opportunism, the cat-flap coalition has ended the year with more resilience than we ever expected. Back in the summer, we talked about how long it would last. We underestimated the lure. We thought that Cameron had put out a saucer of milk, but it turned out to be goose liver pâté. And we seem to have lost our cat.
Hollywood screenwriters say that the first act ends when the protagonist passes the point-of-no-return. In this film, that happened when Dave held back the pâté as the reward for Nick committing to £9,000 tuition fees. Nick licked his lips and agreed. Now he is stuck in this movie, and, for him, there is no return.
Well before the election, Cameron told us that he planned to screw the students. But we did not listen. Each time that he accused the Labour party of creating a generation of debt, it seemed like just a rhetorical attack on Labour. Now we know that he meant that the young would pay for the deficit. It was not rhetoric. It was policy.
When we see the Tories bat away the students’ anger, towards the sandal wearers, we do not just see the stupidity of Clegg, but also the trickiness of Cameron. This is what we are up against. Tricky Dave is not to be underestimated. Read the rest of this entry »
A few years ago, Kevin Pietersen nearly killed me. It wasn’t personal. I was looking for my sandwich; he was looking to hook Brett Lee into row 20 of the Peter May stand at the Oval. I didn’t find my sandwich, but he found the stand.
Two seats to the right, and I would have been a tragic footnote to England’s historic 2005 Ashes triumph. I sometimes wonder if there would have been a moment’s silence for me in Trafalgar Square; a poignant pause before Vic Flowers led Andrew Flintoff in a drunken rendition of Jerusalem. Knowing Vic and Freddie, probably not.
Tonight, England’s cricketers take to the field for the most important cricket match since that fateful, near fatal, day. “What madness is this”, goes the cry. “The cricketing Rubicon was successfully forded a week ago, in Melbourne. We saw the cheers, the tears, the cream of English youth dancing the sprinkler in front of delirious men dressed as Arthurian knights and Camilla Parker-Bowles”.
Lying a short reach from my keyboard is a Cadbury’s Twirl. I want to eat it, as I like Twirls. Most connoisseurs of corner shop chocolate bars do. It seems a fairly logical response for me to eat it. But wait. Eat too many and all sorts of bad things could happen. I could become obese. My teeth could rot. I could end up with diabetes and heart disease. These are not nice things.
What we have here is a defective choice architecture. All the benefits of eating the Twirl are in the here and now. The costs are deferred. Our decision-making is flawed. Even the knowledge of the harm that too many chocolate bars will have is not strong enough to override the impulse to consume this Twirl. Even if we are consciously aware of the long-term cost, it is very difficult to overcome the overwhelming short term emotional benefit.
Somehow, I need a short term nudge to prevent long term pain. Essentially, this is what the Tory-Lib Dem government’s Giving Green Paper is about. How can we be nudged to do good to make ourselves and those around us more happy? Read the rest of this entry »
David Cameron faced a revolt from rebel Tory MPs last night over claims that he is secretly backing so-called ‘purple plotters’ who want a merger with the Liberal Democrats. Leading Conservative MP Mark Pritchard challenged the Prime Minister to make it clear that he will not allow Tory ‘zealots’ to form a new ‘Frankenstein’ party with Nick Clegg’s Lib Dems at any time, locally or nationally. Unless the plan is stopped in its tracks, the Tory faithful could refuse to campaign for the party in future elections, warned Mr Pritchard, secretary of the influential backbench Conservative 1922 Committee. His threat comes after a growing number of senior Tories, including former Prime Minister Sir John Major, have promoted the idea of maintaining the Tory-Lib Dem alliance after the next Election. – Daily Mail
I know that we are into a new and different sort of politics, what with two parties forming the government and all that, but the bigger of those two parties really is taking the mick in the Oldham East and Saddleworth by-election. Both parties deserve to be punished as a result. It takes a fair bit for me to feel sorry for a Tory, but it is hard not to feel some sympathy with the Tory candidate, Kashif Ali, who has effectively been thrown to the scavenging Lib Dem wolves. From David Cameron down, the message is clear – we will say we are pulling out the stops for poor old Kashif, but we’re not really, and for heaven’s sake don’t do anything that looks remotely like an organised campaign. International development minister Andrew Mitchell seems to have gone further, saying they will do all they can to help the Lib Dems. – Alastair Campbell
Ed’s 100 days
Failure is half-acknowledged in the setting up of a sweeping policy review. But before that process is complete there must be an interim reckoning with New Labour’s legacy. The party needs to know what it is campaigning to preserve as well as what to change. Mr Miliband will himself spend his 100th day in the job campaigning to help Labour retain the marginal seat of Oldham and Saddleworth in a byelection. Inevitably, the contest is being held up as a test of progress against the coalition. Labour’s eviction from power is too recent to expect the party to start looking like a fresh alternative government. That is a long-haul project. But it starts with a clear account of what was right and what went wrong under New Labour. It requires also an account of the leader’s governing principles. After 100 days, Ed Miliband has not yet properly explained to the country as a whole who he is and what he believes. He shouldn’t waste any more time. – Observer
All in this together
Chancellor George Osborne, who defied austerity Britain by taking a luxury break at Prince Charles’s favourite ski resort, Klosters. Ironically, it was Mr Osborne who coined the phrase ‘we’re all in this together’ when calling for massive cuts to get the country out of the red at the 2009 Tory Party Conference. Meanwhile tycoon MP Zac Goldsmith was reportedly sunning himself at a £8,000-a-week villa in the Caribbean over the New Year – in contrast to David Cameron, who scrapped plans for an expensive holiday in Thailand for fear of sending the wrong message to voters. – Daily Mail
Cameron vs Tory right
Conservative backbenchers are preparing to ambush the controversial European Union Bill which goes before the Commons when MPs return from their Christmas break. Eurosceptic Tories will table radical changes to the legislation, which they claim does not deliver on its promise of a referendum on future transfers of powers to the European Union. If the changes strengthening the legislation are not accepted by the Government, some Conservatives said they might even vote down the entire Bill. Last night Labour sources signalled that Ed Miliband, the Labour leader, will order his MPs to oppose the legislation too. The prospect of a pincer movement of Labour MPs and Tory rebels is acutely worrying for Mr Cameron, whose Coalition majority of 76 would be overturned if just over half that number of Tories joined forces with Labour. – Telegraph
More broken NHS promises from Lansley
Promises to improve mental health care for millions of people a year are at risk of being broken as the Government scraps plans to invest money in high-quality research. The coalition’s new mental health strategy, expected to be published shortly, fails to recognise the importance of research in reducing the huge burden of mental illness. This flies in the face of its own promises and of compelling evidence, experts warn. Mental illness is the country’s leading cause of personal suffering, economic loss and social problems, costing England alone more than £105bn in 2009. Those with mental health problems are more likely to get cancer or have a heart attack, for reasons that are little understood. Less than £75m of public money is spent each year on relevant research, a fraction of the sums spent on cancer and heart disease. – Independent
The government’s “reforms” are not the most immediate threat to the NHS. The real term spending cuts are. In 2011, the health service will start to feel the effects of the Tory budget. Which will, inevitably, reduce the standard of care it can provide.
The Conservatives claim to have ring-fenced spending by essentially freezing the budget. However, the rising demand for and cost of healthcare means that funding needs to increase, at well above the rate of inflation, in order for the NHS to stand still.
The last seven years have seen the cost of staff pensions rocket from just over £6 billion in 2004 to over £17 billion in 2011. The cost of PFIs will increase by an estimated £7 billion over the next four years. Furthermore, the health secretary, Andrew Lansley, has demanded that £20 billion worth of “efficiency” savings be made, by the most efficient health service in the world, by 2014. And let us not forget the estimated £3 billion cost of the Tory health reforms. Read the rest of this entry »
2011. What a twelve months it’s been. Tweaking the nose of convention. Hurling itself robustly into the face of popular wisdom. The year of living counter-intuitively.
It started, of course, with the amazing scenes from the Oldham & Saddleworth by-election. Tory activists barring the way to the polling stations for known Conservative voters. David Cameron, in yellow rosette, claiming that his great grandfather was best friends with Lloyd George. Ken Clarke, in sandals, and ill-fitting “Save the Whale” t-shirt, urging voters to “hold your nose, close your eyes, and vote Lib Dem”.
All to no avail. Labour: 25,000; Tories: 15,000; Lib Dems: 133. “A wake up call”, said Nick Clegg.
Oldham & Saddleworth only heralded the start of the electoral drama. There were the unprecedented seventeen by-elections held after Labour MPs convicted of erroneously charging paper clips to their expenses were each sentenced to 13 years imprisonment. Their decision to appeal their convictions was widely condemned by the media. “These paper clip thieving ratbags just don’t get it”, raged Richard Littlejohn. “Hanging’s too good for the scum”. Read the rest of this entry »
It’s been a busy old year. Gordon departed. Cameron and Clegg moved the brokeback wagons into Downing Street. Gideon slashed and burned. Vince tried to waltz his way into some young “constituent’s'” knickers and Ed beat David.
After the arguments over the electoral college in Manchester, and the luke warm tussling over AV we thought it best to pick our winners rather than have a readers vote. The old fashioned way. Feel free to add yours in the comments.
Politician of the year
There really could only be one winner:
George Osborne
Filled with his own self importance, and a belief that he was born to do this. He had the audacity to call his budget “progressive” while slashing and burning with that trademark smirk. But in all serious political circles he has earned (grudging) respect. As Cameron twists and turns, Nick jumps through hoops and Vince dances around a resignation, Gideon has become the rock at the heart of the Cameron government. Well advised, well rehearsed and well… impressive. Let’s hope 2011 isn’t as good a year for the man who could keep Labour out of power for the next decade.
Runners up:
Ed Miliband won against the odds. Has finally beefed up his team and started landing punches. A win in Oldham East & Saddleworth followed by a good showing in the locals could give him the momentum to really take on the government in 2011.
David Cameron. He won. Just. He made it into Number 10. Just. He ends the year with decent poll numbers all things considered, a “radical” programme and a sturdy majority (courtesy of his Lib Dem pals). Fair dos. Not a bad position for a PM to be in.
Best supporting politician
Winner:
Nick Clegg. Like The Man from Del Monte in the old ads who liked to say “yes”, Clegg’s willingness to hop into bed with Cameron and accept his “big, comprehensive offer” now gives him more clout than any of his predecessors since Lloyd George. But at what price?
Harriet Harman for super-subbing during the summer, although lost marks for her fingerprints – or at least dinner plates – being all over the Hewitt/Hoon plot.
Geraldine Smith (late of Morecombe & Lunesdale) whose gutsy defences of Gordon and denunciation of all wannabe coup-ists was a sight to behold.
Brass neck of the year
What a 'Jeremy Hunt'
Winner:
Nick Clegg for his volte face on tuition fees.
Runners up:
Hewitt and Hoon for their risible, back-of-a-fag-packet plot to oust Gordon Brown.
George Osborne for calling the budget “progressive”.
Tony Blair for saying Bank of England independence was his idea in A Journey.
Liam Fox for his “fury” over his leaked letter to Cameron about defence cuts.
The man behind the man award
Winner:
Stewart Wood From Peter Parker to Spiderman. The bespeckled Oxford don and foreign policy adviser to Brown became the war time consigliere to Miliband Jnr. Masterminding the tortoise vs the hare victory over Miliband Snr. Now a peer with his sights set on taking down Sayeeda Warsi.
Runners up:
Sue Nye Respected for her long-suffering loyalty to successive Labour leaders and unfairly fingered for Gordon Brown’s Mrs. Duffy encounter (“It was Sue” squealed the nark). Bows out both well-liked and well-respected.
Ray Collins for helping keep the Labour show on the road and ensuring that Labour did not do as badly as some predicted. Or end up as broke.
Off to a flying start award
Winner:
Rory Stewart for his less than generous remarks about the sartorial standards of his constituents.
Chris Kelly the publicity hungry backbencher is rumoured to be taking his chicken whisperer act on “Britain’s got talent” next year.
Survivor of the year
Winner:
Andy Coulson. Like all spin doctors, a wannabe Rasputin. And like the mad monk, seemingly unkillable. He ends the year in situ. But the phone hacking scandal is not going away.
Runners up:
Vince Cable One time Lib Dem treasure, ended the year on a low after trying to impress two young undercover journos with his “nuclear option.” Neutered but still walking. Just.
Jonathan Ashworth. It is said that in the event of a nuclear holocaust Jonathan Ashworth will still be working in the Labour leader’s office. 3 masters in 12 months.
Gisela Stewart. One of the bright points of a grey evening was seeing Birmingham Edgbaston – the first seat to indicate the Labour landslide back in 1997 – stay Labour.
Nigel Farage. A plane crash at the general election, a train crash of a successor. Britain’s favourite little Englander still stands.
Political battle of the year
Winners:
Miliband vs Miliband. Part A river runs through it, part The Godfather II. It was what it was always going to be: two brothers divided by their determination to get the top job. It leaves a legacy. It must. But is there more drama to come?
Runners up:
Osborne vs Mandelson. You might think you know which one is the better politician, but only one of them masterminded their way into government this year
Balls vs Gove. Michael Gove’s early billing as a star of this Tory generation took a near fatal hammering from a brutal master of political pugilism, Ed Balls. Gove’s calamitous decision to axe the building schools for the future programme was made to hurt more than he ever imagined it could.
Adam Boulton vs Alistair Campbell. Did Sky want the Tories to win the election? At a corporate level we can be fairly sure that it did. At a journalistic level? Hard to say. But Boulton’s reaction shows that the accusation strikes close to the bone.
(Ex) minister of the year award
Winner:
Alistair Darling To emerge, as chancellor, from a beaten government and a tanking economy with your reputation enhanced is truly a remarkable achievement and the mark of a quietly brilliant man.
Runners up:
Kenneth Clarke The Tory right may be screaming for his head, yet his enlightened approach to prison reform may set penal policy in a direction that actually works. But will Cameron’s nerve hold and keep Ken where he is?
Bob Ainsworth An unlikely hippy, it’s safe to say, but his recent call for drugs reform was a significant intervention from a former minister who knows that the “war on drugs” was lost long ago. The number of people who secretly agree with him but would never dream of saying so is a small part of everything that is wrong with politics.
The Jo Moore award for PR disaster of the year
Winner:
Bigot-gate Gordon Brown’sdescription of Rochdale pensioner, Gillian Duffy, as “that bigoted woman” was the undoubted numero uno gaffe of the general election campaign. Few recall, however, that Labour took Rochdale from the Lib Dems on election night.
Runners up:
Fire up the Quatro poster. A spectacularly ill-judged Labour campaign which turned Cameron into one of the country’s most loved TV characters.
Airbrushed Cameron Equally backfiring idea, which showed Cameron to be even more plastic and artificial than he is.
Liam Byrne – His “there’s no money left” note to his successor, David Laws, was quickly used as a stick to beat him with. A colossal mistake by an otherwise smart man.
The fourth (rate) estate award
#Hackinggate Non-reporting of the biggest media scandal in decades. Guilty consciences all around Fleet Street as no-one seriously doubts that the culture of phone hacking goes well beyond one rogue reporter at the News of the World. We know this because people keep owning up to it in the Guardian. Yet, apparently, this despicable practice, the gross and illegal abuse of privilege, doesn’t warrant a mention in the vast majority of the press.
Runners up:
Nick Clegg’s Nazi Slur on Britain One of the most pathetic days in recent British journalistic history. Andy Coulson got exactly the headlines he wanted. Those responsible – editors and scribblers – damaged their own reputations to suck up to their future bosses, and Lib Dem central office wasted a day fighting fires started by lickspittle. Tawdry, tawdry stuff.
Kay Burley Sky News’s afternoon anchor. Just type her name in to YouTube. Enough said.
Prediction of the year
Winner:
DanHodges for his “David Miliband has won” prediction on Uncut, five days before the coronation ceremony. At which Ed was crowned.
The shadow chancellor, Alan Johnson, urges an 11th hour rethink of Tuesday’s planned VAT rise in a letter to the government today, as theConfederation of British Industry (CBI) warned public spending cuts could lead to a dramatic slowdown in the pace of economic recovery. Outgoing director general of the employer’s body, Richard Lambert, predicts “bumpy times ahead” for businesses which are “extremely uncertain” about what the new year will bring. “That’s understandable because the economic and political outlook both seem volatile over the short term,” said Lambert, who is knighted in the New Year honours list. “For a start the pace of economic recovery could slow quite markedly in the first few months of 2011. The VAT increase will be taking effect, and the construction sector will start to feel the pain of public spending cuts,” he said. While the influential body is not predicting a double-dip recession and expects the rate of growth to pick up later in the year, Lambert expresses concern about the early months of 2011. – The Guardian
Rebel rebel
Government MPs are rebelling against their parties’ policies on a scale not seen since 1945, new research for The Independent has revealed. During the Coalition’s first seven months, dozens of Conservative and Liberal Democrat MPs – including many elected for the first time in May – have repeatedly defied House of Commons whips to vote against the Government. The findings suggest the Coalition – which has a Commons majority of 84 – could be vulnerable to defeat as the Government becomes more unpopular and the austerity measures hit home. Earlier this month the rise in tuition fees scraped by with a majority of 21. The research, conducted by Professor Philip Cowley and Mark Stuart of Nottingham University, found Government MPs rebelled in 84 of the 160 Commons votes between May and 20 December when Parliament rose for the three-week Christmas break. They say the 53 per cent rebellion rate is “without parallel in the post-war era”. – Independent
Lansley U-turn on flu after Healey pressure
THE ConDems were forced into making a humiliating U-turn as the flu death toll rose to 39 last night. It launched a desperate publicity drive to curb the spread of the virus – just months after scrapping an advertising campaign as too costly and unnecessary. Health Secretary Andrew Lansley has now resurrected the £1.5million “Catch it, Bin it, Kill it” programme. Geoff Martin, chairman of pressure group Health Emergency, said: “They scrapped the publicity to save a few pounds but placed people’s lives at risk.” The Health Protection Agency said the number of flu victims in intensive care has almost doubled in a week to 738. Twelve more people have died since last week, on top of the 27 victims killed by the virus since October. – The MirrorRead the rest of this entry »
Spare a thought for poor George Osborne. The chancellor has had a tumultuous year. A great office of state before the age of forty. Master of all he surveys. Slashing and burning for Britain. Curbing the excesses of the poor.
A crafty winter holiday was the least he deserved. Klösters, the world’s most exclusive ski resort, the only destination equal to his sybaritic grandeur.
But at the airport this week he was reduced – like the most impotent child – to tears of frustration at the loss of his luggage. Reports reach that he shouted and stamped, cursed and cajoled, but nothing could call into being the exquisitely riveted corners of his monogrammed portmanteaux.
The chancellor is not thought to be staying at the Klösters home of his millionaire associate, scion of the famous banking dynasty, Nat Rothschild.
He is thought, sadly, to be still looking for his luggage. Airline executives are counting the cost as we speak.
